Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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