Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Randomize
