I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
