and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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