and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
