i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
