its not stalking. its research.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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