Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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