Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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