I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
