Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
