dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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