I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
