the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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