I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
