? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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