no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
