Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize