I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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