Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize