Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Randomize
