will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
