Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
