thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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