If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
