i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
God I need to hump something, right now.
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