maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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