the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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