You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
