yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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