do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
