Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize