Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I am naked and annoyed.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
