Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
