So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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