Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
