I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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