O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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