Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
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