I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
