im about as happy as oj after his trial
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Randomize
