i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
