OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
