His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
