so that wasnt chicken after all
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
