i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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