bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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