Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
