i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
