The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
