I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
