Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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