I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
