whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
